Go Tories

Mark Rubin

Parliamentary democracy and the U.S. system differ greatly. It’s no small thing that across the pond the Prime Minister does not appear on any national ballot. The Prime Minister (Boris Johnson), one of 500 Members of Parliament, answers to: (a) his constituents in Uxbridge and South Ruislip, in West London; and (b) the Conservative Party, which can replace him as its leader.

Here, of course, we the people elect our national leader, Donald Trump.* He leads his party and our nation, but he holds office for a fixed term, subject only to: (a) impeachment and conviction; (b) death or incapacity; and (c) the voters on November 3, 2020. And, because of his appeal to many among us, elected R politicians kow-tow to him at every turn.

Structural differences aside, events in London on September 4 highlight the abject failure of the Republican Party over the past 957 days. Mr. Johnson—a poorer, smarter, and slightly less dishonest and offensive Donald Trump—got his ass whipped in the House of Commons. Can’t do a No-Deal Brexit. Yep. Snap elections. Nope, and by 298 to 56. Kicked 21 MPs out of the Conservative Party. Fine by us, say those he removed. (As PM, Mr. Johnson depends on having a Conservative majority in the House of Commons. Phillip Lee took off on Tuesday, depriving Mr. Johnson of a majority. Kicking out another 21 people? Dumb, dumber, dumbest!)

Brexit was an ill-advised, poorly designed referendum. Prime Minister David Cameron, in a fit of hubris, put to the people a notion he surely thought they’d reject. He erred! Then, others dealt with the mess, and seemed surprised by the notion that the European Union didn’t make the UK exit easy. The UK bought a pig in a poke, which is always a dumb thing to do.

G-d bless the Tories for making Mr. Johnson’s life miserable but, still, I cry for the UK! Until 1976, I only left the United States of America to go to Mexico. (I haven’t been in Mexico for 43 years. Don’t look for me there again.) But for brief trips to Bermuda and Vancouver years ago, I have spent about three weeks in England and a few days in Ireland since 2017. Loved the place! Of course, there are martini challenges in London. About them: in the States most bars serve beer, wine, and spirits. In England, pubs focus on beer and ale, while bars do cocktails. (On our last visit three bartenders made their first ever martinis for me.)

Why do I have so much love for the English? They’re decent people, and more than a little bit quirky. They’ve adapted to no longer being the center of the Universe. (Americans will handle their fall poorly, for sure.) They favor their children and their culture. And, while Tucson establishments compete well when it comes to fish and chips, none of them do mushy peas like the English.

So, hats off to the Conservative Party when it comes to giving their leader a big … well, you know: begins with an F and ends with a U. But for Rep. Justin Amash (I – Mich.), not one elected Republican has honored him or herself like the Tory MPs did today. Lame-ass losers!

*Well, sort of, because for right now, the electors we choose every four years can ignore the voters who chose them. Even if they couldn’t, though, who gets inaugurated depends heavily on the distribution of votes across the states.